What She Said

After 7 months.....

2006-08-03T10:24:00.000-07:00

I probably will not be blogging here anymore :(

I have decided to keep my home and work life very seperate. There are a couple of people I would rather not be reading my blog....

If you have any questions or would like to email me....

angela@ncf.ca (or you can email my hotmail address if you have that one!!)

Dreaming!

2006-07-17T14:51:00.000-07:00

Coin Collection

2006-07-17T14:17:00.000-07:00

These are coin sets that my granparents bought me when I was young. The years range from 1973-1977!

Here are all the coins I have collected over the years. Most of them are coins from Europe from when my bestfriend went. She visited 12 countries and I told her all I wanted were postcards and coins!! But I also picked up the odd coin here and there when I worked as a cashier. People would accidently give a carribean or british coin instead of quarter and I would change them in and keep them! Probably changed my quarter in for a mexican penny or something, but I liked the coins.... As a child I was in love with "bunny" nickels.

Sometimes for fun I look at the Canadian Mint website! I used to have more coins but I once gave my brother some as a gift because he collects coins and I was too poor to buy him a birthday gift. I also once sold some of my silver and half dollars because I was poor. I really regret selling them!

This is my grandfathers 1976 Olympic coin set. I got it when he died (when I was 7). It is the only thing I have of his.

Books, Movies, and more...

2006-07-16T08:21:00.000-07:00

I went to Chapter's to look for the book "If Budha Dated" but it was sold out, however I found the book pictured above! I loved "The Four Agreements" so I am hopeful I will love this one too. This book is another ancient toltec wisdom book/ practical guide.

My trip to Old Navy was disappointing. Everything was on sale but I didn't find anything I wanted. I did buy two white t-shirts though. They had some pretty sweet baby clothes, but I resisted buying them as I don't have a baby!

Ever since Parasol posted about Greens+ I have been reading their website... and have become interested in some of their other products. I bought Shape+, Lean+, and Abs+. All natural weightloss supplements full of things that are good for you, like calcium, green tea, CLA... It was expensive, but I figure it'll be worth it if it works. I am also interested in some of the other ones, such as Joy+, Serenity+, and Adrena+.... to increase happiness and decrease stress.

I rented two movies. "If Only" and "The Truth about Love" Turned out when I got home that they were both British Movies and both had Jennifer Love Hewitt in them. Weird! I absolutely LOVED If Only . I would definitely buy it. It is something I think about all the time. What if you get into a fight with someone and then they die. Anyway the movie was really sad, and the second half was really intense. I think my sister would really like this movie! So now I have 3 independent films I want to go out and buy (which I will probably have to order)- Imagine Me & You, Easy, and If Only.

Benjamin, my mini rex

2006-07-14T20:27:00.000-07:00

Tim called me at 7pm and asked me if I wanted to go to his place to have dinner with his parents tonight. Very spontaneous. I usually like to know these things in advance, but tonight I had no plans so I said yes without hesitating. Dessert at DQ! I had a good evening. A good start to my 3 days off.

Tim's parents visited my apartment and were very taken by Ben! It is hard not to love a mini rex with their plush velvety coats and curly whiskers. I could own a dozen of them.

Quiz

2006-07-14T15:45:00.000-07:00

Quiz time
1. The book nearest me - Marley and Me (borrowed from Parasol today)
2. Stretch out left arm what do you touch? - air- if my arm was longer, dried herbs and dried maritime berries in a vase
3. Last thing watched on television? -News
4. Without looking what time is it? - 6:05pm
5. What actual time is it? - 6:12
6. With the exception of the computer what can you hear? -TV commercial
7. When did you last step outside? - two hours ago when I biked home from work
8. Before this survey what did you look at? - various blogs
9. What are you wearing? - chocolate colored capri pants and my blue Maine shirt
10. Did you dream last night? -nothing that I can remember, thankfully. Two nights ago I dreamt I was shot twice at work (nice!!)
11. When did you last laugh? - I cannot remember (note to self- must laught more!!)
12. What is on the walls in the room? - prints of van gogh paintings, print of a Monet, photo of the ocean, two paintings I did, a candle holder, bulletin board, a mirror
13. Seen anything weird lately? - yesterday at work a guy (that I did not know) took off his shirt and showed me his tattoo
14. What do you think of this quiz? - nice to have new quiz questions
15. What is the last film you saw? - on DVD- Failure to Launch, in a theater- the Lake House
16. Tell me something we don't know - I don't do my dishes everyday. Oh well. The world hasn't come to an end yet :)
17. If you could change one thing about the world, what would you do? - Have the world run by introverted women (I think the world would be much more peaceful)
18. Do you like to dance? - LOVE it!19. George Bush? - no comment
20. Imagine your first child is a girl - pick a name- Isabelle or Charlotte ( Tim and I's grandmother's names) or Eila (after a friend I had when I lived in Toronto- pronounced Ay-lah)
21. Imagine your first child is a boy - pick a name- something Irish probably. Will need to buy an Irish baby names book.
22. Would you consider living abroad? - Yes. I feel confident enough now to know that I would be fine living anywhere in the world. There are definitely some places I would gravitate to- Western Europe, or anywhere south of the equator.
23. What would God say to you when you reach the pearly gates? - I don't believe in God or the Pearly Gates.

Spaded and has Shoots! (that title's for you Parasol!)

2006-07-13T15:44:00.000-07:00

Here is a picture of Tabitha, sitting on my bedroom window sill looking outside. Most of the time if I don't know where she is that is where I find her. Seeing her shadowy figure behind the curtain makes me smile. She spends most of her time these days looking outside or napping in the window sill. It seems like a nice way to spend time. She is 16 now. She is very peaceful and seems to be doing reasonably well (hairloss and vomitting aside!)... Every day with her is a blessing.

Plans for the weekend:

trip to Old Navy
see a movie
get outside for a bit (maybe a picnic?) I am in need of a bit of nature.
possibly a trip to SDM as this weekend if you spend $50 you'll get a free magazine subscription!! I am hoping they will allow points as payment- but even if not I could still probably come up with $50 worth of needs and wants!
Need to go to Loblaws to get groceries and deposit money into joint savings account.
work on scrapbook and/ or jewellery project

That is it so far! Sounds exciting, doesn't it??

Thank You

2006-07-11T18:44:00.000-07:00

This morning while crossing the street I found a squirrel that had just been hit by a car. It was warm, and still breathing, but bleeding from its mouth. I moved it to the sidewalk and sat down beside it. I pet it, wondering if it would live if I called for help. It died right then. I was happy it didn't suffer for very long. It wasn't there when I went into the store so it only had to have been just hit. Two girls stopped, one to help, and one after the fact to say I did a wonderful thing that she wouldn't have been able to do. I really hate roadkill.

I only slept 5 hours last night so when I got home from work I fell asleep for 3 hours.

I would like to sincerely thank all of you who supported me and listened to me the past couple of weeks. Every kind word meant so much. It all helped me stay sane. I feel very loved by the people around me. I have had two very emotional weeks in a row. I now feel a sense of normalcy has returned to my life. THANK GOD! It always take a while to feel back to normal after such emotional turmoil... but I am optimistic that things are back on track now.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Last night I went on my treadmill for an hour. I have lost 5 lbs in the past week- making my total of 33 lbs in the past year. I have lost almost 20lbs since Christmas. I am quite pleased. My new "mini" goal is to lose 8lbs. I no longer eat to feed some emotional need. I eat to nourish my body. Usually on weekends (or special occassions) I will be a little more slack and will allow myself to eat foods that are otherwise not a part of my life. No deprivation. I am thrilled with my ability to maintain a healthy relationship with food. I have also cut out most diet drinks and replaced pop with water (sometimes with chunks of lemon squeezed in) and iced green tea. I am still horrified with myself that I ever gained the weight in the first place. But I do believe that within the next year (hopefully much sooner) I will be thin again and healthier and happier than ever. I will not be happy because I am thin- I will be happy because I will be healthy and my external body will match the way I feel on the inside. I feel I am a better person for going through this whole weight journey. I am a work in progress, making small steps everyday to reach my goal of internal peace and happiness.

Last night I finally finished reading "Tuesdays with Morrie" which I can now return to my sister. It was such a sad, but inspirational book. I highly recommend it!

Herbs

2006-07-08T15:57:00.000-07:00

This is my window garden. Lavender, basil and mint.

There are so many thoughts and emotions swirling through my head that I cannot share so instead I post this.......

The Farm

2006-07-06T18:53:00.000-07:00

Work on my mother's scrapbooking gift has come to a stop... I haven't been feeling creative this week. I am having a very difficult week actually.

Here is a page from the scrapbook. This is a picture of the farmhouse my parents bought when I was young. We would go up on weekends to renovate it. It had apple trees. I loved this house. It was in the country on the Quebec side. There was about an acre of land. Next door there was a farm with cows. It had 6 bedrooms and two staircases going upstairs. It also had a piano, which I thought was wonderful. Even though I was only about 5 I can still remember alot about it. It is a giant happy memory in my mind. I think it was about 100 years old... I could be wrong. My parents sold it because they decided we would never move there because all the schools were french only. The person who bought the house tore it down and build a bungalow (or something stupid like that). That always upset me.... I wish we had more pictures of it.

Flowers

2006-07-03T08:28:00.000-07:00

We celebrated my mom's birthday yesterday. These are the flowers I bought her.

On Being Happy

2006-07-02T19:42:00.000-07:00

Here is an interesting article I found about Happiness!
(this next bit is from www.biopsychiatry.com)

Why do insults once hurled at us stick inside our skull, sometimes for decades? Why do some people have to work extra hard to ward off depression?
The answer is, for the same reason political smear campaigns outpull positive ones. Nastiness just makes a bigger impact on our brains.
And that is due to the brain's "negativity bias": Your brain is simply built with a greater sensitivity to unpleasant news. The bias is so automatic that it can be detected at the earliest stage of the brain's information processing.

So it should come as no surprise to learn that it plays an especially powerful role in our most intimate relationships. Numerous researchers have found that there is an ideal balance between negativity and positivity in the atmosphere between partners. There seems to be some kind of thermostat operating in healthy marriages that almost automatically regulates the balance between positive and negative.

Here's the tricky part. Because of the disproportionate weight of the negative, balance does not mean a 50-50 equilibrium. Researchers have carefully charted the amount of time couples spend fighting vs. interacting positively. And they have found that a very specific ratio exists between the amount of positivity and negativity required to make married life satisfying to both partners.

That magic ratio is five to one. As long as there was five times as much positive feeling and interaction between husband and wife as there was negative, researchers found, the marriage was likely to be stable over time. In contrast, those couples who were heading for divorce were doing far too little on the positive side to compensate for the growing negativity between them.
Other researchers have found the same results in other spheres of our life. It is the frequency of small positive acts that matters most, in a ratio of about five to one.
Occasional big positive experiences--say, a birthday bash--are nice. But they don't make the necessary impact on our brain to override the tilt to negativity. It takes frequent small positive experiences to tip the scales toward happiness.

So, what does this all have to do with me?

Apparently, one small negative comment can undo many hours of happiness. I guess this would explain why I have such a hard time "bouncing back" after a negative comment or incident. Because I know that I have a hard time with depression and anxiety I have spent the last several years trying to focus on the positive, surrounding myself with positive people, reading postiive books, and trying to maintain a postive outlook. It is a much happier and healthier way to live. And when I encounter negative people I usually try to minimize my time around them as I don't want to be sucked into that energy draining pit of gloom and misery.

I want a life filled with joy. I want a home filled with laughter. I would take that over a million dollars anyday. Inner peace has been at the top of my wish list, over everything else, my entire life. Happiness trumps everything else.

In Random Order

2006-07-01T23:08:00.000-07:00

My new top from Old Navy. When I got to the cash it was $7.95 including tax!!!! What a deal. It was regular $34.99m but the price tag said $23.99. It has elephants on the bottom....

Fireworks!!!!

I bought a new ring in the market.... $5.00.

Me! All dressed in red & white plus 3 Canada day tatoos on and ready to go!

We went to Parliament Hill but decided not to stay as they were searching bags and our "picnic" included wine.... along with cherries and havarti with carraway.... yum! So we went back to Major's Hill Park :)

Corina (my sister) and I

We also went to Mexi's in the market and had margaritas and nachos!!!

It was a fun. but exhausting day. LOTS of walking.

HAPPY CANADA DAY!

2006-07-01T08:39:00.000-07:00

My favorite day of the year.

As a child my father would make my brother, sister and I stand out on the intersection where we lived (at Montreal Rd- which was high traffic) and wave a giant Canada Flag at the passing cars.

My sister and I are going downtown for a picnic. (we are aiming for a day long event- staying until the fireworks at 10pm).... I have trouble finding people who want to go downtown with me, willingly and enthusiastically. I long for the day that I have children I can dress up in red and white and bring with me!!!! Some people get this excited about sports (soccer! hockey!) so I don't think its that weird that I have found two days (St Patty's Day) of the year I like to really celebrate.

When I am 45 it will Canada's 150th birthday- I have been looking forward to that since the 125th birthday. I have 11 years to go....

I will post pictures later!!

P.S I found cherries on sale for 1.99/lb yesterday :)

My bedroom!

2006-06-28T15:12:00.000-07:00

Here is my newly rearranged bedroom. It took me 2 hours. Monday I was upset and I did it because my papazan chair was always in the way... I definitely have too much stuff for my tiny apartment. I rearrange furniture when I am really upset. It just happens. It always makes me feel better. I am loving my bedroom so much more now.... My favorite piece of furniture is the red wooden hutch (pictured in the middle with the lamp on it). I bought it off my friend (plus a pine bookshelf, the mirror in the top picture, and the sunflower picture in the bottom picture ALL for $50.00) ... I loved in when I lived with her 10 years ago and could not believe she wanted to get rid of it (last year) and would have paid almost any amount for it. Her dad had completely refinished it and restained it and it looks like new. I LOVE it. I really would love new curtains though.... These are my homemade ones. I also made the curtain rods out of stained bamboo and hooks. I would love to make irridescent sheer silky curtains with a beaded trim in a rich pink or red.... and have REAL store bought curtain rods and finials! I used to have a mosquito net to go over the bed from Pier 1 with a beaded trim but Friday climbed it when she was a kitten... so I took it down.

I have begged Tim to let me decorate just one room any way I like so I can do it in a Morrocan/Asian theme with all kinds of funky textures and colors and I can put my beaded lantern and pillows. It will probably be the spare room or something. Maybe a "yoga room/ reading/ spare guest room".... When I was little I wanted to live in a "genie bottle" just like on "I dream of genie" with gorgeous velvet pillows everywhere.... I love color, textures, beads, silk, velvet, sequins. It will be an awesome room... guests will LOVE it!

Do you believe in love at first sight?

2006-06-26T08:01:00.000-07:00

"Imagine Me and You" was fantastic! What do you do if you meet the love of your life after you are already married? It makes you think about love and love at first sight. British romantic comedies are my favorite. This one was really good. I would buy it.

"Me, You and Everyone We Know" was good, but dark. About the subtle things that happen day to day. I love Independent films.

Tommorow is the funeral. I just had a very sad chat with my mom. Tim is leaving for Boston again on Wednesday. Friday I am going to see the Lake House with Sue. Saturday is Canada Day- which I am celebrating with my sister, downtown. What a week.

joey and scarlet

2006-06-25T15:55:00.000-07:00

Joey (on right) and Scarlet (left) are my 5 year old chinchillas. Every morning when I go into the kitchen they are snuggled up in their fleece hammock. They are so sweet. I just adore them. Sweet, quiet, gentle, curious, comical... Today I bought them some dried cranberries and raisins at the Herb & Spice.

Work was horrible today.

I am feeling much more sad about my uncle... It seems like when I get bad news I go into shock or denial or something. It takes a while to absorb it... and the more I think about it the more emotional I get. And then I try not to think about it. So I have to distract myself. But there is this underlying feeling of sadness that is constant.

To distract myself I rented two movies: Me and You and Everyone We Know, and Imagine Me & You. (seems like a bit of a me and you theme... didn't even realize that until I got home... it took me forever to decide what to rent- I almost rented "Easy" again cause that is my favorite!!!!!! I have already rented it 3 times because I can't find it for sale in the stores. I must get around to ordering it oneday! )

I have been bloated and crampy for 3 days.

My Uncle Colin

2006-06-24T17:39:00.000-07:00

My uncle died. My mom is really upset, which really upsets me. I can't call her because she is too upset to talk. I wonder how my aunt is doing. Probably not so good. She and my uncle have been together forever... Sometimes I hate how temporary everything is, and how eventually you will have to say goodbye to everyone... I hate goodbyes.

The only thing that comforts me is knowing that oneday (when you die) you get to see everyone again :) But when someone dies it make me think about death. my own and everyone else's. I try to remind myself to appreciate things more. To cherish everyone who is still alive and a part of my life. I cannot even image the sadness I would feel if I lost Tim, or my parents, or sibblings...

It might be similar to this:

When my cat "Ash" died 4 1/2 years ago I lived in Toronto. That was the most grief I have ever experienced for any living thing. I quit my job, called off my wedding, and moved back to Ottawa. I had no plan. just grief. My entire life changed in an instant. It took me exactly a year to stop crying. He was my comfort and he was gone. And he died in my arms at four years old from liver failure. I finally figured out that he reacted badly to valium. Something I didn't know about cats. Some cats cannot handle valium and it can cause liver failure very quickly (within a week). That experienced changed me more than any other in my life.

I understand that kind of grief that rips your heart out because I have felt it. I also know that time is very healing. So where I am not at all religious, I am strongly spiritual. I believe very strongly in karma, reincarnation, and afterlife. Those beliefs help me make sense of sad things and give me comfort. I don't think you can understand that kind of grief unless you have experienced it, and I think once you have experienced it you really feel sad for the people who are going through it. It is so hard.

Other than that the grief I have experienced has been varied... the loss of many pets, my grandparents dying when I was young, two coworkers , a friend , and my favorite cousin...

Seeing other people grief stricken upsets me. I can empathize. I hope I don't have to experience that kind of loss any time soon....

Life is sad. and short.

Some Great News!

2006-06-22T15:46:00.000-07:00

This good news came directly from my coworker and sweet friend by phone- just as I was thinking how sad it would be for Willie and Waylon to be seperated after they have found so much comfort together:

Willie and Waylon were adopted TOGETHER!!!!

Today!! their first day up for adoption!!!! I am SO HAPPY! My boys get to stay together. They LOVE each other!! They will be so happy... and they are going to a home where they will live with an 8 year old cat and will be indoor cats (and NOT declawed!)... YIPPEE!!!!!

In other news, I made a bracelet today with my new beads... FOR ME. Sorry the picture is blurry... It looks very similar to the neclace I made a while ago (see picture on previous post!!) . I never ever make myself anything... and since I have made so much for other people I thought I would make something for myself!

I Hate Goodbyes

2006-06-22T10:55:00.000-07:00

Today has been a flurry of emotion.

The Bad Stuff:

Today Tim and I returned our foster kittens for adoption. I always feel like I am abandonning them. I hate saying goodbye. They will live in my heart forever. My apartment is so quiet again. I really hope they get adopted quickly. (must not think about it too much or I will get sad...)

Last night I found out my Uncle (Collin) had a heart attack and will probably not survive :( VERY sad news....

The Good Stuff:

I lost another pound (you can't see me but I am doing a happy dance!!)... I finally broke free from the stupid number I was stuck on! I have been eating really good so I knew it would pay off!! I have lost 28 lbs in the last year.

I went to the Parkdale Market and bought cherries, on sale for $4.99/lb, cucumber (for Ben- as the only cucumbers I eat are pickled- ha ha!), corn on the cob, and strawberries.

The new Food and Drink Magazine is out at the LCBO! Gotta love FREE magazines! I felt weird about just going in for the free magazine, so I bought some Yellow Tail Shiraz too!

Good Morning!

2006-06-21T06:35:00.000-07:00

This morning my alarm was set for 9am- which would have given me exactly 9 hours sleep. I woke up a few minutes before my alarm... I heard one of the kittens in his litter box so I jumped out to go look to make sure everything is OK as they are hopefully going back for adoption tommorow! (weird that I am obsessed with my pets bowel movements... but it is such a happy day when everyone poos good!)

I then decided to go pee and when I put the seat up Willie jumped head first into the toilet. Nice. Which is exactly why I keep the seat down!! He is so quick!! Then I found Waylon playing with my good water bottle lid and straw. And then I turned around and Friday was in Ben's cage. Ben was running loose. I was trying to feed Tabitha (seperately) so I had baby gated myself in the kitchen with her.

Last night when they were being quiet (usually a bad sign!!) they had taken a bag of whole wheat buns from the kitchen table and dragged them into the bathroom! Luckily they didn't eat any, they just made a few little holes in the bag.

So now that everyone is fed, and all litter boxes are clean I am going to have my morning coffee....

Firefly

2006-06-20T19:41:00.000-07:00

Here is a list of all the good things I try to do for my body daily:

sleep enough (9 hours preferably)
drink water (so much that I woke up 4 times last night to pee- which really seemed to interfere with "sleeping enough")
drink green tea (cold)
take a stress vitamin (B & C)
quit smoking (one month today!)
yoga
biking almost everyday
walking (when I am not on my bike)
reduce stress
eating healthy foods ( including fruit, fiber, whole grains, unsalted trail mix, soy)... I am trying really hard to cut out processed foods and crap food. It is becoming easier everyday! Today I fell in love with cherries :)
very limited alcohol and diet soda
take echinacea (to help with my allergies) and apple cider vinegar pills

I feel pretty good.... I still want to do more. I have alot of years of unhealthy habits to undo. One day at a time....

P.S. Last night there was a firefly in my apartment... It was glowing!! When I went to sleep he was flying around lighting up the dark spaces... I was too tired to try and catch it. I haven't seen it today so I am hoping he made his way back outside!

My Day included:

2006-06-19T14:42:00.000-07:00

sleeping in

40 minutes of yoga

biking to Loblaws Superstore

making prints of pictures for scrapbook (for mom)

deposited money into our joint account!

bought groceries

doing laundry

talking to my mom

(found out the neclace I made for her friend FIT!!!! and she loved it!)

chatting with my sister via emails

cooking dinner (baked potato and soy "chickenless" burger)

reading Yoga Life Magazine

Happy Father's Day!

2006-06-18T07:43:00.000-07:00

My new yoga mat!

I fell in love with this card making kit. It was definitley a splurge to buy it... but it made me very happy! I love making cards. I would much rather make them than buy them in the store! The hardest part was deciding between the two kits. The other one was really nice too! It has 60 embelishments for the (18) cards... but I figure I will probably use some of the kit for scrapbooking. The stuff in it would make the sweetest baby scrapbook ever. All we need now is a baby :)

I also bought a whole bunch of bead supplies that I needed. I have to make another blue neclace (like the last one) but slightly larger as we don't think the first one will fit. The last one took up most of my blue beads- so I bought enough and then some. I also bought silk cording to try a new project (inspired by my stepmom's new neclace!!). I could easily spend a million dollars at Michaels. I definitely need more space for my crafting supplies.

While at Michaels I decided that I would make my mom a scrapbook(of her and I) for her birthday in July. I made her jewellery for xmas and mother's day so I thought something different would be good. I think she gave me most of her pictures of me as a child so I am going to use the Kodak picture maker and get copies... I think she'll like it. I bought a small red scrapbook, some scrap booking paper and have found a bunch of pictures so far....

Tim and I were supposed to take the kittens back for adoption Sat morning but Waylon had diarrhea and one of the cats vomitted food so we had to put it off for a few days! It's always something with those two. They just don't want to leave...

Today we are going to my dad's for Father's Day (dinner). HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!

And then I am still off tommorow.

Iced Tea

2006-06-15T18:40:00.000-07:00

I finally got around to making homemade Iced Tea. I used morrocan style PC mint Green tea, some fresh lemon and lime, low cal sweetener, abit of honey and fresh mint leaves. Very tasty!! I am also quite pleased with how the picture turned out ! I very rarely ever take a good picture of anything, so when a picture does turn out it is sheer luck. I don't have any editing software (YET) - so this picture is completely uncropped and unedited!!

Playing

2006-06-15T18:20:00.000-07:00

Waylon (left), Willie (middle), Friday (right)

After dinner (marinated chicken and veggie kebobs and rice made by me!) we played with the cats. Waylon, Willie, and Friday play so well together. Friday and Willie wrestle. It is so sweet to watch. I am constantly amazed to watch as there is a significant (8lbs??) size difference between them! Waylon is most cautious about wrestling such a big cat. Willie has no fear whatsoever. I even witnessed Friday licking Willie's head. Exhausted from a vigorous play session with the laser pointer, they are all asleep now. Saturday is the day the kittens go back for adoption! (Tabitha had no interest in playing...but would show up once in a while for petting!)

Does everyone know this?

2006-06-14T15:14:00.001-07:00

Every once in a while I say something really stupid. This only seems to happen when I am with Tim for some reason. He gets a good laugh from some of the things I come up with. Sometimes it is because I talk too fast or don't think about what I am going to say or I confuse two things.....

As some of you know from a recent post that I have had a craving for sweet pickles. They are the only kind of pickles I like. And I have since childhood. So on grocery day I bought some. Yesterday I was sitting on the bed with Tim eating a few with a fork. Tim and I were passing them back and forth. I put the lid on a looked at the jar. I decided to see what all the "other things" in the jar actually were as I only like the pickles and sweet pickles always seemed to be "mixed". Cauliflower, onions.... weird though that the first ingredient is "CUCUMBERS"... Why isn't the first ingredient "PICKLES"? So, I ask Tim "uh, are pickles cucumbers????" I always thought pickles were pickles... NOT pickled cucumbers.... Hmmmm... I was SHOCKED. And then horrified.

I can't be the only person who doesn't know.... can I?

At least now I can add cucumbers to the list of food I like!

a work in progress

2006-06-12T16:14:00.000-07:00

The current color of my hair- in bathroom lighting!

Maybe it would look lighter if I took an outside picture? In the sun... Will have to try that and compare!! maybe tommorow, there isn't much sun left today.

I am an addict

2006-06-11T20:57:00.000-07:00

Today is my 19th day in a row smoke free. Tim reminded me today that isn't actually that great since I had quit for a whole YEAR and then started again. But to me it is a huge victory as it was really really hard to quit and stay quit. I would quit every week at least and then relapse over and over again. What seemed to help was watching a TV show on alcohol addiction. It made me realize that I am an addict and cannot have even one. I fooled myself over time to think I could just start and stop at will. but it got harder and harder to quit, or to remain smoke free. I feel like the hardest part is over so I don't want to go back again. I have moments when I crave one but they seem to pass. I am not obsessed with it right now. Most of the time it is easy... I just have to get through the hard moments when they come.

This is my weekend to work and it wasn't so bad. I am loving my newly re-arranged schedule! I am off tommorow instead of Tuesday and it has made a huge difference on how I felt all weekend as well as how easy my normally dreadful Sunday shift was. After working Friday, Saturday and Sunday it is so nice to be off tommorow. Next weekend I have a 3 days off which will make this week even easier. I also have a 4 day weekend coming (Canada Day weekend). I have booked off an extra Monday a month (at my own expense) to try to create some much needed balance in my life. So my new schedule will only have me working one Monday a month, instead of 4. Mondays are insane at work.

After work today Tim and I spent 9 hours together :) It was really relaxing. We laughed, talked, shopped... We cashed in 40,000 Shopper's Points for $100 worth of free stuff. We bought lamps that were a really good price! On sale for $25 for a set of 3. It is exciting to buy things for the house that we will oneday have to decorate. It is nice to find things we both like. That is the challenging part.

I recently cashed in 100 airmiles for a Chatelaine subscription.

Tommorow I plan to : sleep in, do laundry, groceries, clean, repot my new plants- and use my new (not likely to start a fire) curling iron. As soon as my hair gets long it gets pretty lifeless so I am hoping this will add much needed volume and life! As well I bought John Frieda's blonde nourishing spray. I am determined to highlight my hair in the cheapest (and most time consuming) way possible as I simply cannot afford to get it done in the salon. So I use a blonde highlighting spray, as well as highlighting products (shampoo, spray, foam mousse). I hate that my hair gets so dark when I am not in the sun. It seems to be lightening very gradually...

And hopefully I will get a chance to roll all my change. My estimate is that we now have about $80 in change. Not bad for a month of collecting change. And so far I have collected ALOT of stuff for my next yard sale. Does anyone have an extra clothes rack I can borrow to hang clothes on that day? Or any ideas as to where I can get one cheap? I also need tables to display things....

Day 16 Smoke Free

2006-06-08T19:08:00.000-07:00

Today is the 16th day I have not smoked. And today I finally got on my treadmill :)

I am craving chicken kebobs with sweet peppers, onion, pineapple marinated in BBQ sauce. I also found a recipe I want to try: Pineapple salad (with carrots, pineapple, lime juice, basil, mint, chives, black pepper)...

and I also in the mood for walnuts and sweet pickles.

I froze all the leftover lasagna from last weekend in individual servings and it is delicious! homemade lasagna in under 5 minutes!! not too unhealthy since I used extra lean meat, partly skimmed mozzarella, and light sour cream (instead of ricotta).

I bought a "Lipton diet green tea with citrus" drink today- was pretty good. And I am thinking I might try making iced green tea from scratch. I have never made ice tea, but how hard can it be!?

Fish!

2006-06-08T08:20:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I was not feeling well. physically (back pain and upset stomach), mentally, emotionally, spiritually. I was weepy and irritable. I didn't sleep at all the night before. I decided to take a walk and see if that helped me feel better. I went to the second hand store and found these 4 books! $2.00 each (in brand new condition and regularly priced at $29.95 each- what a bargain!!). I often find that reading is "healing". I try to read something that will put a postive spin on whatever problem I am experiencing. It worked! I am not feeling 100% better but I feel much better. Sometimes it is good to take a step back, take a deep breath and refocus.

They are very easy reads. The first one Fish! is about improving morale at work. It defines the four steps for creating a better work environment (for ANY type of job) . Essentially their philosophy is this:

1. choose your attitude

2. play (fun is energizing and sparks creativity)

3. make their day (customers or co-workers)

4. be present (focus on what you are doing in the moment)

The second book is Fish!Tales shows examples of real businesses putting the philosophy into action. The 3rd book is Fish! Sticks and it shows how to adapt to change, to make change stick, and how to keep work fresh. Fish! for Life is how to be your best at home and how to achieve your dreams.

I think it is a wonderful concept.. and that everyone should read these!!

Shopping and Dinner

2006-06-04T20:32:00.000-07:00

Before dinner we went shopping. I bought new blue crocks! I love them :) and I bought 2 tshirts and a white shirt (pictured) that Tim calls a "hippy" shirt. It is pretty and feminine and very summery. I also bought two books. I love books on alternative health care.

We had a very enjoyable dinner at my dad's house tonight. We brought over dinner and cake so my stepmom could have a break and not have to cook. Tommorow my dad goes in for knee surgery, again... And my brother and his gf came too!

A very good weekend. Other than not catching up on much needed sleep! At least I can sleep in this week as all my shifts start at noon. And I will have time to do yoga also.

Happy Birthday Tim!!

(I promise next year I will be more organized)

P.S And we opened a joint bank account this weekend!! So, we are legally joined "at the bank"! That was kind of fun.. Our bank guy was funny. Very talkative. We went with PC Financial instead of with either of the banks we deal with for other stuff... Mostly because we won't have to pay any fees for anything. It'll be neat to get our cheques with both our names on them!

Random Thoughts

2006-06-03T11:46:00.000-07:00

Here is a pic of Waylon and Willie playing in the papazan chair

Today is Day 11 of NOT smoking

I hate that my weekend off is rainy and gray

Tommorow is Tim's 38th birthday

I am making Tim homemade lasagna for dinner and I bought lemon cheesecake from Thyme and Again for desert (they have the BEST desserts)

I am waiting for Tim to get here...He took a nap (at his office) and is now over an hour late :( I will forgive him since I know how tired he is AND it is his birthday weekend!

Canada Day is coming up... Is anyone interested in having a picnic on Parliament Hill with me?

Surprisingly I have received alot of compliments on my lime green sandals

I can't find my book "Herbs for Health and Happiness" anywhere in my apartment... I LOVE that book and it is very annoying that I have misplaced it

Lavender

2006-06-02T13:46:00.000-07:00

Last night during our trip to Shopper's Drug Mart Tim bought me Method Lavender cleaning supplies. Hand soap, dish soap, cleaning wipes, and all purpose spray. Smells wonderful. And such a pretty color. (I know I have blogged about my love of this stuff before so I won't go on and on about it...)

We spent ALOT of money last night. I am not sure how exactly that happened. We needed alot of things I suppose. We now have ALOT of points. We have enough points to cash in 75,000 points to get $150 worth of free stuff.

And then we went to Dairy Queen for a treat.

Thankfully it is Friday! I am so happy to be off for two days. I feel too exhausted to get anything done right now. I am in desperate need of sleep and lots of it.

Strawberry Smoothie :)

2006-05-31T18:53:00.000-07:00

I biked to the Parkdale Market after work and bought strawberries (and some carrots for Ben). I also bought Mint, Lavender, and Basil. When I got home I made a strawberry smoothie (just strawberries, ice, milk and 2 packages of sweetener) and it was delicious!!!

Waylon and Willie are on Doxy for 10 days. They did well travelling back to the shelter and being housed in a cage surrounded by angry, hissy cats and listening to dogs barking. However, they were very happy to be home! Willie now weighs .98kg and Waylon weighs 1.98kg.

Tommorow is 20x the points at Shopper's Drug Mart (the 'secret' event- by invitation only).. Tim and I are going after work. I am finally going to buy the John Frieda Blonde Luminous Color Glaze. I cannot count the number of trips we have made to SDM together- We do love going there. We go to EVERY 20X the points events.

I have saved $50 in change over the past month. I have saved ALL my change- everyday I empy my change into the jar. This weekend we are opening a joint savings account... to start saving for our future goals...

That is about it. Work was stressful. I am exhausted. I haven't done yoga at all this week as I have to be at work at 8am and am too tired when I get home. I wish I could force myself to go to bed early and get up early to do it, but I can't seem to. I am missing it....

Goodnight :)

Willie N

2006-05-30T19:09:00.000-07:00

Willie is now about 2 months old. He is double the size he was when we started fostering him. It took him 3 weeks but he is finally big enough to jump up to the window from the chair. He was sound asleep when I took this picture. He is such a darling. Very gentle and affectionate. Waylon is becoming more loving and even lied in my lap today. They both got their first nail trims today. I will miss "my boys" when they go back for adoption. But it probably will be a while as they have URI and I have to get them meds. It is always so hard to say goodbye. But I am getting better. Although the thought of it always makes me sick to my stomach....

clutter free kitchen

2006-05-30T18:37:00.000-07:00

I spent 3 hours cleaning/organizing my kitchen today. I threw out 2 big bags of garbage and I have a huge box of old dishes etc to throw out on Sunday. I went through every drawer and cupboard. I also put aside a few things for the yard sale. I spent about another hour organizing the rest of my apartment and did two loads of laundry.

I never showered or went outside. What a fun day off (not).

I love my cookbooks! I love browsing recipes. Sometimes when I go to other people homes I browse through their cookbooks as well.

sheep, water, clutter

2006-05-29T19:22:00.000-07:00

Tim's back... He came straight over from the airport to see me. Just showed up and called me from outside me livingroom window :) I am so happy he is back.

He bought me this Sworovski crystal sheep. I love sheep :) And I love swarovski crystal, although I only own a collection of crystal beads for jewellery making. This is my first crystal "thing". I love him , and all the rainbows he will make. Anyway, I have shelving unit on my wall that has a collection of things that are meaningful to me and he will go on it, next to the other sheep. It is good to have a place to put "little things".

... yup, that's Vitamin Water in my fridge. He bought me 6 but I already drank 3. They aren't going to last long. very sad.

I started writing this blog entry last night and then got too tired to finish. I slept 11 hours last night. My central air is working again. yay!

I have quit smoking for 7 days. I keep telling myself that I am an addict and cannot have even one. It seems to be working. I am trying to do it all- eat well, excercise, quit smoking, save money... but my newest decision is this: to declutter in an extreme way. After going to Krishna's neat and tidy house I have decided to gt rid of alot of my stuff. So I am going room by room. I will have a garage sale for some of it and the rest is garbage. Whatever doesn't sell at the yard sale will go to St. Vincent de Paul (since it is near me and I shop there I want to support that store). I want a clutter free life. I want a home that is easy to clean and organize. I am going to part with as much as possible. I love to organize but I feel like I have too much stuff for my apartment.

I am excited to have another yard sale.... last years family yard sale was fun and we raised $300 US for our trip... Maybe I can talk some people into selling some stuff too (but we'll each sell our own stuff this time) and we can have it at Dad's again in Orleans and have a BBQ etc... sad that Dad doesn't have a pool anymore. Corina? George? Tammy? anyone? I am thinking a Saturday in late june or sometime in July. I will keep my stuff in the basement until then.

Today

2006-05-25T14:55:00.000-07:00

Sleep: 8 hours (with alot of dreams)
yoga: 30 minutes
biking: 15 minutes
cigarettes: none (yay!)
alcohol: none, although I keep wishing for a glass of Yellow Tail Shiraz :) And I keep forgetting to stop and buy a bottle....
converstaions with people: one phone survey (weirdly enough she asked if I was concerned about mold in my home!!!! ) and three cashiers (I long to speak to Tim and see how he is doing in Boston)....
tv watched: part of the Mom Show (while I was making a gift ) and the last few minutes of Dr. Phil (while blogging)
food: cereal, cereal bar, and 6oz of raspberries (I am currently in day 3 of doing a 2 week cereal challenge to lose 6lbs!)

oh, and I wore my new green sandals biking (with rolled up brown cords- very stylish!) and they were SO comfy and airy. I think I will start wearing them to bike to work.

Love

2006-05-25T08:46:00.000-07:00

Tim has gone to Boston. 4 days. He'll be back Sunday night.

Alot of the people I know who are married or in relationships complain alot about their significant other. Alot of people I know also have stayed in relationships even though their inner voice said that person wasn't "the one". Or they just stopped trying or caring. For all practical reasons it was easier to stay or they somehow justify that it is OK. I have never been able to do this. There is something inside of me that longs for more... and I have gone to great lengths to find it. I am idealistic, but also realistic. My ideal relationship would include: respect, trust, open communication , laughter, chemistry, as well as someone who can appreciate all my craziness, quirkiness and really just love and appreciate me for who I am, exactly the way I am. Those things are all a must. The rest is all negotiable.

I am happy I didn't give up. All of those things I have found in Tim. I love and adore him in a way I did not know I was capable of. Neither of us, nor our relationship, is perfect- but somehow together we are. I am happy I held out and never settled. There is something inside of both of us that wants this so much that we both constantly work to make it better. That is the magic.

The joy of Cats!

2006-05-24T18:05:00.000-07:00

Tabitha is looking well these days... She is eating really well. Here she is pictured in one of her favorite spots. On a blanket beside my pillow. She sleeps there every single night and when I wake up in the morning she is still there... This morning I guess I tossed an turned because when I woke up she was lying stretched out on my pillow above my head as her spot was taken over by pillows! Good thing the cats and I share a queen sized bed... lots of room for all of us! Friday always sleeps at the end of the bed near my feet. But usually she is up near my face/mid body by morning. There is something so wonderful about waking up with both of them beside me. They are both extremely quiet- I never get woken up by them.

The foster kittens have coccidia, and now URI! They are both sneezing and probably need antibiotics, so I will be bringing them in to work for a vet visit oneday soon (by taxi as Tim will be in Boston! great timing kids!!!) Good thing they are so adorable, because they are alot of work!!!

glass bubbles

2006-05-23T19:18:00.000-07:00

I love this. It is the size of a large orange. It is really heavy. And inside there are a million bubbles (or maybe alot less actually). I guess it is a paperweight. It cost $1.00US. I bought it in a dollar store in Maine last summer. It is one of my favorite things. It reminds me of a crystal ball. I like looking at it, in it, through it. I really love transparent glass...

$100 Painting

2006-05-23T08:12:00.000-07:00

Just over two years ago I decided I wanted to start painting again, so I purchased $100 worth of art supplies. This is the only painting I have done since. So I guess it cost me $100 to paint this. But I really like it. It was an expression of how I felt at the time. It was the end of a very long, hard journey and the beginning of a better phase in my life. I keep it on my wall as a reminder of how far I have come in my pursuit of happiness.

Time to get scared...by myself

2006-05-20T19:05:00.000-07:00

I bought 3 movies today:

Amityville Horror (the remake)
Saw 2
the Weatherman

And a Yoga DVD (which I hope I like better than the last one I bought!!!)

Sucks that I have to watch horror movies by myself. At least I have the cats for comfort... I don't know why exactly, but every since childhood I have loved horror movies. My sister and I would stay up and watch them on TV (back when there were no VCR's) and we would eat lemons to stay awake and then I would sleep with her.

On the way to Tim's parents in McAdam (in April) we were driving late at night on the highway surrounded by woods, in the fog, and his engine light came on.... Well, doesn't he slow down and all I could think was "don't stop the car"... It was exactly like out of a horror movie and I was so scared... The cell phone doesn't even work in that area. Thankfully he kept going. Thank god the car didn't stop working.

Tommorow night I am going to Retro 80's night at Barrymore's. I have wanted to go dancing for ages but was waiting until I had a monday off... I haven't been out since November to dance. And I haven't been to Barrymore's in over a year.

I want to rent When a Stranger Calls (the remake) and Hostel (Quinten Tarantino) also, has anyone seen them?

Bling!

2006-05-20T18:39:00.000-07:00

Tim is going to Boston next weekend for work. He asked me what I would like him to bring me back. I said "a ring". And if not a ring, then some vitamin water!

Better Pictures...

2006-05-20T08:45:00.000-07:00

Better pictures of the neclace I made. This weekend I have to give it to my mom. I really have grown attached to it and think I might make myself one! Or if it doesn't fit right, keep this one and make her a new one!! I really do hope it fits though.... it was ALOT of work. I always worry AFTER I make something, or buy a gift. I start second guessing my choices and become slightly obsessive. In the end everything is usually ok. I hate anxiety :(

Our new friend at work!

2006-05-20T08:12:00.000-07:00

Yesterday at work there was a wild rabbit hanging around the outside of the building. The second time it came around it sat outside the front door and I was watching it from where I sit at my desk. I took a few pictures and then Sue went up close and took this one! When I left work I saw it running through the parking lot. It was a nice way to end a very long day.

A day in the life of me

2006-05-17T13:41:00.000-07:00

So far today......

Sleep: 11 hours last night, no naps
cigarettes: 0
alcohol: none
excercise: none
mood: happy
laundry: 4 loads (very productive)
minutes outside: none
movies watched: one (Shopgirl was VERY good!!)
looking forward to: having dinner with Tim and watching America's Next Top Model
need to: buy batteries for my camera and take a shower

Done!

2006-05-17T13:10:00.000-07:00

It took 4 hours but I finally finished the neclace my mother asked me to make for her friend. I am very pleased with the way it turned out. Unfortunately my camera batteries died and I cannot seem to get a good picture! But I like this picture because it shows the way the colors look in the light. It was a difficult project to start. I was waiting for inspiration...and waiting...and waiting. Finally after 5 months, it is complete! I really hope she likes it.

Movie Night

2006-05-16T14:01:00.000-07:00

Waylon and Willie have coccidia! Positive fecal ++++. Good thing I brought in a sample today for testing. 10 days of meds :(

I am tired and a little annoyed by some of the daily events. I am happy to have a day off tommorow. What a long, busy day today. As a "reward" for getting through the last 4 days I rented two movies: Shopgirl and Rumour has it... I wanted something light. Can'[t wait to catch up on my lost sleep tonight!!

My Mother

2006-05-15T15:43:00.000-07:00

Idea taken from here! (hope you don't mind! I couldn't think of anything else)

Ten things about my mother:

She lived in an orphanage for 7 years as a child after her father died. When she returned home to her mom she was 11. She has 6 brothers and sisters. (OK, that is more than one thing but it is all inter-related!)
She used to be a nurse, but now volunteers 3 days a week at Shepherd's of Good Hope. She is very passionate about homeless people and even invited one to Christmas dinner one year.
She is very spiritual
She taught me everything I know about kindness, compassion, karma and astrology
She loves poety, reading and music
She (and I) love Leonard Cohen
She hates to cook (but makes the BEST homemade mac and cheese, and stuffing)
She and my stepdad have been together 20 years but never married
She loves beads, and moroccan interiors (just like me!)
She is very quirky and a non-conformist

I love you MOM!!

Happy Monday

2006-05-15T15:29:00.000-07:00

Today, inspite of going in to work at 8am after working all weekend, not getting enough sleep for the last 3 nights, and the rainy weather I managed to feel very calm and happy all day today. Maybe it was because I had a good afternoon yesterday at my mom's. Or maybe it is because all the mold is covered up and I feel healthier again. Maybe it is because I made some jewellery and started working on a new jewellery project. Today I felt alive and vibrant. I was extremely productive. I don't know where the inner calm has come from, but I sure do like it!

I am happy that Aras won Survivor last night. I am happy that Terry didn't make it to the final two. I am not too keen on people who only win due to physical strength. I know if I was on survivor that it would irritate me to no end to see the same person win every immunity challenge. I liked that the winner was a yoga instructor, and not macho or arrogant. I liked that Siri was honoured by her teammates and that she was voted by the public and won the car. I liked this season alot more than some of the other ones.

Tequila.... it's the miracle cure

2006-05-13T16:21:00.000-07:00

After my long day at work I decided to make myself a margarita :) The green bowl in the background is perfect for rimming the glass with salt. I am so happy I bought a mini (smoothie) blender!

As I sat down to drink my margarita the landlord starting ringing at my door. Reluctantly I answered. He re-caulked my bathroom tub- but insists that somehow this "problem" is not mold and is somehow my fault. Says I should keep my windows open more. I explained that when I am home I do but when I leave I do not.... I also explained that there was NO window in the bathroom I could open and that there is no fan in the bathroom so THAT is the reason that moisture built up in there. He claims he has now solved all those problems so that should be the end of it. However I do know that once you have a mold problem just re-caulking it will not help as you are not dealing with the source of it and it will just keep coming back. I just hope somehow I can move before it does. There is a very BIG part of me that just wishes I fixed it myself and never even bothered to mention it. In the end I just thanked him for what he did and said goodbye and downed the rest of my margarita. Thank god for tequila!!!!

Golliwog

2006-05-11T23:18:00.000-07:00

Everytime I look at Waylon I think of 'Woggi', my Golliwog doll that I have had since childhood. He was a character in the Noddy stories (by Enid Blyton) that we read as kids. He must be about 30 years old now. I had no idea as a child that he would become so controversial and politically incorrect. I love him nonetheless.

Who is Norine?

2006-05-11T22:53:00.000-07:00

Someone went Sharpie crazy and labelled everything! I have lived here 2.5 years and all of a sudden when I go to do laundry everything is labelled. I am thinking it has something to do with the new upstairs tenant. I am guessing her name is Norine. Very odd indeed. There were several other bottles labelled as well. For some reason none of the boxes of fabric freshener were labelled....

MOLD

2006-05-11T22:22:00.000-07:00

Convinced that their is mold in my bathroom I waged an all out war against it today. I went to Home Hardware twice. I used an entire bottle of Fantastic with bleach, pulled off the caulking and re-caulked around my tub. I am certain that this black ugly stuff is contributing to my not feeling well. I also went to speak to my landlord, who told me he didn't think it was mold, but grease or grime. He did agree to re-caulk my bathroom this weekend and took off the plastic wrap from the window so I could air out my bathroom. (I really don't like people being in my apartment when I am not there. I worry that my cats may accidently get out) There is no bathroom fan, so it does get very moist and humid in there. The bathroom ceiling in peeling. Very ideal conditions for mold to grow. Very frustrating that he didn't believe me. Tim finds it all amusing. I think he thinks I have gone completely mad and lost my mind.

I know I am allergic to something and that seemed very logical. I have done alot of "mold" research lately and am pretty convinced. But maybe it is something else! The only person that believes me is my mother. Feeling pretty angry and crazy I called her and had a nice long chat about mold, flower essences and the mind/body connection.

Between the stress at work, Tabitha's near death experience, and not feeling well I have been feeling aggitated and irritable. So I am going to start doing yoga again and try to quit smoking again to improve my overall wellbeing. I am also going to see my doctor about Zyban and allergy testing.

The neighbour's cat came to visit again today and completely upset Waylon. He hissed and freaked out, in turn upsetting Willie and Friday. So in response to that I threw half a glass of water at the cat through the screen. That cat is ALWAYS outside!!! And becoming a huge annoyance.

Friday in the Window

2006-05-11T10:11:00.000-07:00

When I first saw this apartment I fell in love with the windows in the livingroom. The middle window opens into the apartment like a door, leaving a perfect space for cats to hang out and get some fresh air. There are alot of birds and squirrels that hang out on the front lawn and tree to watch also.

Waylon

2006-05-11T09:48:00.000-07:00

All the cats love to sit in the window sill and look outside. Waylon finally figured out how to get up there all on his own. He and Willy are the best of friends now.

Goodbye Sara!

2006-05-11T09:34:00.000-07:00

Sara was kicked off America's Next Top Model last night. So that leaves Jade, Joanie, and Danielle. I am hoping Joannie wins. But I wouldn't be disappointed if Danielle wins because she has such a great personality :) If Jade wins I will probably throw something at the TV.

Season after season I never get tired of watching this show!!

Baby Shower!

2006-05-07T17:48:00.000-07:00

Tara's baby shower! Look at all the presents! So many sweet things for the new baby :)

Happy Birthday Matt & George!

2006-05-06T22:33:00.000-07:00

Jenn (my step sister) and George (my brother). May 4th was George's 33rd birthday.
Matt (my step brother) turns 21 on May 7th (today). We had a big party at East Side Mario's for him.

Big birthday love going out to my two sweet brothers! Hope you don't have too much of a wicked hangover tommorow Matty :)

My New Camera!

2006-05-06T22:13:00.000-07:00

I bought a digital camera today! This was the very first photo taken. The camera is a Polaroid PDC5070 (although mine is 16MB, not 8MB ). It only cost $79 plus tax at XS Cargo. I love that I can now take pictures, upload them, email them, and add them to my blog whenever I like!! It is a wonderful little camera.

Waylon and Willie!

2006-05-05T13:56:00.000-07:00

Finally a picture of our foster kids!! This picture was taken while I was packing them up at the shelter to bring them home. Waylon is on the left!! Willie is on the right!

They are now getting along so well and often sleep curled up together. They are also getting along with my two cats. They have adapted so well to their cage that I am finally letting them out to explore the apartment- which they love!! My goodness they are sweet :)

Happiness!

2006-05-04T18:34:00.000-07:00

Things I am happy about:

Tim- the love of my life
my new foster kittens (and that they now like each other...pics coming soon!!)
the weather
having yet another day with Tabitha :)
having my income tax debt paid off and getting $200 back!
my new bike
I am sleeping better most nights (I have managed to kick my Nquil addiction finally)
my new ice cube trays- they make long skinny ice cubes to put in water bottles

Things I am unhappy about:

Tabitha's recent "episode"
people wanting to keep squirrels as pets
my stupid allergies...everyday I wake up feeling like I have a cold. At least a cold goes away, I have felt like crap for about 9 months!
my two months of therapy has ended... I will miss my very zen & buddhist savvy therapist
trying to figure out what to buy my two brother's for their birthdays this weekend... Girls are SO much easier to buy for/ make gifts for than boys!

Tabitha

2006-05-02T17:34:00.000-07:00

Today I thought Tabitha was going to die. She wasn't interested in eating and when I looked at her her heart and breathing were heavy and strained. I thought her heart was going to just stop working. I know she has a bad heart murmur. She seemed very comfortable though, lying in her normal way and closing her eyes... so I lied with her, talking to her, kissing her and petting her. I cried and cried and cried. Then I gave her some rescue remedy as I wanted her to stay calm and not panic if she was going to die. Then I decided to let her be as she curled up in her favorite place and slept. When she woke up she was hungry and seemed much better. She rolled on her back and purred and ate and meowed. She seems normal again... for now. I guess it was a blessing that I was off today.

Here is a little tribute to Tabitha. Everything you ever wanted to know about my cat:

I adopted her from Sheridan College in Toronto. We had an adoption center and each group had to manage the center for 2 full weeks a year. She came in on my rotation. A classmate handed her to me and told me I would like her. Her owners seperated and neither of them wanted to keep her so they brought her in. She was 10 years old.
I have had her since December 2001. She is now 15 1/2 years old.
I call her my guardian angel as she got me through the darkest time in my life.
her nicknames are Mrs. Tabitha Twitchit, Tabbers, Tabitha Boo, Boo
The only person that uses my papazan chair is Tabitha- it is her favorite place to sleep (but she also sleeps on the bed and on the papazan ottoman)... It is a very big cat bed to keep around in my very small apartment!!
She only meows is I am talking on the phone or if she wants me to open the door to let her explore the basement
She hates Ben the bunny, but seems to like Friday and even licks her head.
Rarely can I ever work on the computer without her insisting on sitting in my lap.
She loves attention and NEVER gets fed up. You could probably hold her and pet her forever.
She never meows for food.
she still plays sometimes. the other day I threw a cat ball across the apartment for Friday to chase and Tabitha ran full speed after it
She hates the cat carrier- just seeing it makes her nervous and run in the opposite direction
she loves to sit in the window and look outside
She loves to lick plastic bags. Weird, but true.
She has had a series of medical problems: chronic irritable bowel, UTI's, cataracts, food allergies, mild kidney problems, heart murmur. Also on her bloodwork it shows up that she has mild lymphophenia.... Right now she weighs 7.3 lbs. I weigh her about once a week.
She has had housesoiling issues off and on for a couple of years. no problems since last August though... I have become somewhat of an expert at sorting out that problem.
For the first time in 4 years she is able to tolerate normal cat food and doesn't need to eat allergy food. I can finally feed her treats!!
she is timid but also very social
She never bothers you when you are eating. I guess her previous owners never fed her human food. She also never jumps on tables.
She is the sweetest cat and I will miss her so much that it makes my heart ache. I hope I am lucky enough to find another cat oneday that is so quiet, gentle, and loving. I consider every day I have her a blessing.

Our 15th and 16th Foster Kittens!

2006-05-02T07:02:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I noticed that an orphan kitten at work had a "to be fostered" card on his cage for 3 days. I offered to foster him. He is a DLH brown tabby with white. He is about 4 weeks old. He has been scared, hiding in his litter box. On Sunday I gave him a bigger box to hide in. But then I found out there was another kitten that was having trouble being placed in a foter home, as he was a "staff only foster" so we decided to take both of them. The second kitten is a male black DSH. He is scared and hissy. I set the two of them up in my big black multilevel 'midwest' cage. It is a fantastic cage for kittens. Alot more room. They really need names! We will probably have them for a few weeks anyway. The black one is very hissy still and isn't overly fond of the other kitten, yet. Luckily the other kitten isn't too upset about it and just stays out of his way or sits and watched him play. He is a bit too young to fully grasp the concept of play but seems entertained to watch. I look forward to seeing their relationship develop.

Friday is surprisingly ok with the new kids. A hiss and a grumble- but nothing compared to the first time we brought fosters home and she waged an all out war on them for several days. Once they are comfortable and let out to run around it will be good for Friday to have some young friends to play with and get her abit more active!!! Tabitha goes about her normal routine without even seeming to notice them. She is surprisingly tolerant about newcomers in the home. She is a pretty happy old cat.

Glassy eyed Beads!

2006-04-28T15:44:00.000-07:00

A girl in NB makes these glass beaded pendants. I love them. I now own 3 of them. One Belly Button (top, I have the lime green one) and two disks (a large blue, green and yellow and a small red, orange and yellow). They are so cheerful. They are made freehand without molds using a bench torch and glass rods. I would love to learn to do this. I also love her "fiddlehead" pendant. I saw it when I was there, but didn't buy it. They are even cheaper than that usually because they come on a black cord and I put them on my own silver chain.

Check out her website! She sells stuff through her website, as well as at the Fredericton farmer's market and apparently at a store in Kingston, Ont.

My First Ride

2006-04-28T15:25:00.000-07:00

I rode my new bike today for the first time. It will take me a bit to get used to my new bike. It feels different and I am still getting used to it. I didn't have much of a chance to try out the radio as I was riding through traffic on Wellington.. I will have more of a chance this weekend riding to and from work. That is the ONLY good thing about working this weekend.

I went to mail my sister her birthday gift, bought a new bike lock, and stopped in at the Herb & Spice for a few things. It was fun to mail a gift! It is nice to be able to create a happy moment for someone.

2006-04-27T21:42:00.000-07:00

My new bike!! I love it. It is blue and silver. It came with the water bottle holder, the rear carrier, and a light with a built in AM/FM radio and horn. I guess its a women's hybrid-comfort bike. It has alot more 'bounce' than my old bike. I am excited to ride it! I think I will go buy another lock for it tommorow. I wasn't too worried about anyone stealing my old crappy (rusty, ugly) bike, but I don't think my current lock is good (or big) enough for this bike! I think it is going to be quite wonderful to ride a new bike. And I get to listen to the radio while biking- awesome!

On top of getting a new bike, I also got to spend a great 4 hours with Tim :) A fantastic day off!

2006-04-27T07:47:00.000-07:00

Today I am going shopping for a NEW bicycle. I have two big decisions to make. Do I want a Men's bike or a Women's bike? Do I want a mountain bike or a regular bike? I CANNOT decide! The only thing I know for sure is that I would LOVE a RED bike! That might not be possible depending on the model I choose. My current bike is a dark green men's mountain bike. I have only ever had a new bike once and that was when I was about 10 years old.

2006-04-27T07:23:00.000-07:00

I have never been allergic to anything in my life. For the past 6 months I have been sniffling and sneezing everyday. At first I thought it was a cold that just wouldn't go away- but I think I am allergic to something. I am so curious to know what it is that I am allergic to. I am going to the doctor someday soon to find out. I imagine I will have to be referred to an allergist and there will be a long wait? Does anyone know? Do they test you for everthing all at once? I have always been so proud to not be allergic to anything.

Maybe I should invest in a negative ionizer?

Here is some information I found on Negative Ions:

Negative ions are odorless, tasteless, and invisible molecules that we inhale in abundance in certain environments. Think mountains, waterfalls, and beaches. Once they reach our bloodstream, negative ions are believed to produce biochemical reactions that increase levels of the mood chemical serotonin, helping to alleviate depression, relieve stress, and boost our daytime energy.

Negative ions help freshen and purify the air by causing allergens such as pollen, mold spores, dust, and animal dander floating in the air (which have either a neutral or a positive charge) to be attracted to and stick to each other, forming 'clumps' (because opposite charges attract). These clumps of particles then become heavy enough so that gravity can pull them down to the floor, where they can be vacuumed up, rather than staying in suspension where they can be breathed in and cause allergic reactions.

See this and this for more information on negative ions!!

2006-04-24T18:03:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I went to buy groceries. I walked to the superstore and took a taxi back. I spent 2 hours grocery shopping.... here is what I bought:

lettuce, dandelions, peppers, onions, tomatoes, potatoes
multigrain bread, whole wheat pitas, hamburger buns, croutons, 2 bagels
salad dressing- low fat sesame thai and fat free honey dijon
pasta and two seasoning pouches
pizza sauce and PC bruschetta
hummus
light old cheddar, fresh parmesan, light mayo
breaded meatless chicken burgers (I love these!!)
butterscotch puddings, granola bars,
whole wheat waffles
PC light shepherd's pie (single portion), light Stouffer crustini's, PC General Tao Chicken

non-food items:

a new hair dryer

PC tealights (orange blossom scent)
A beauty pack containing facial moisturizer (Garnier "fresh") --which I needed and love, facial cleanser (Nivea cleansing clothes) , two hand lotions, after sun lotion, sample suntan lotion.... I love these "sample packs"... I always buy them. I like getting so many things for $7.99. The moisturizing or cleanser alone would have cost more than $7.99 each... I remember as a kid buying the "teen packs" and never really got over the thrill of it... It is a great way to try new products!!

2006-04-24T17:47:00.000-07:00

I really like the new show "What About Brian". I forgot it was on tonight as we started watching it when we were in Saint John, so I missed half of tonight's episode. My friend Matt says its a yuppie show that probably won't last... but I am hoping it will. I think he is wrong :)

I stopped by the gas station tonight to put air in my bike tires. My back tire went flat and now I cannot ride my bike :( That is very sad. I was covered in bike grease and had to walk my bike home from the gas station. I have decided to buy a new (possibly used) bike. It is my primary source of transportation. My bike is such a piece of crap that it is not even worth fixing (in my opinion!). Sucks that I will be walking to work in the meantime.

First day back at work went well. Not too crazy. I brought in my trip pictures, but didn't really have much time to show them to people... maybe tommorow!

2006-04-23T08:27:00.000-07:00

In NB, Tim did my taxes. I am SO happy. My refund is 720.00. I owe $527.31 from past income tax, so I will be getting almost $200. Yippee. And I will start getting my GST credits again. Finally the $1100 I owed them will be paid off!

I am going to try to save as much money as I can in the next year. And while I was away I also vowed I would work harder when I got home to eat better and excercise more. I want to start using my treadmill again- as well as my normal routine of biking and yoga. Being away from my normal routine gave me time to evaluate things a little better. I am feeling very motivated.

2006-04-23T07:48:00.000-07:00

I am back. We drove yesterday for 14 hours. I think that is my last road trip for a while. My next holiday is going to include an airplane and a beach/swim up bar :)

The weather today (cold, gray, rainy) is exactly the weather we had in NB for 7 out of the 10 days we were there. It did manage to get sunny for about half our trip to Grand Manan Island. It started off warm and sunny...but became increasingly cold and windy. So windy we thought the ferry might be cancelled. But it wasn't. We went to three lighthouses. I took an entire roll of film just on the Island. My favorite gift shop was closed.

So last night we got home at midnight. Diana was not here, but her stuff and foster kittens were. Hmmmm, no note. I was beyond exhausted. I fed and cleaned all the cats/ cleaned litter boxes, let Diana's foster kittens out for a run, then decided to go to bed. I had the worst headache when I got back. At 1:30AM I came out of the washroom to go to bed I heard a noise, and when I came out there I saw a young, cute guy fling himself onto my bed. I think Diana near had a heart attack when she saw me. She thought I was coming home Sunday... Wow, that was awkward. She was drunk. I had written in three places that I would be home Saturday night. So we decided, after a minute or two, that she and her friend would leave and she would come back in the morning to pick up her stuff- and her foster kittens. We did try calling her several times to let her know we were on our way home, but there was no answer.

It is so nice to be home... Diana has come back for her stuff. It is now quiet. I am happy to once again be NOT sharing my space. I have missed my alone time. I have one day before going back to work. My pets look well and happy. I did find cat pee by the front door though... hopefully an isolated episode. I opened the living room window this morning and my neighbour's cat jumped up onto the outside window sill and was looking in through the screen!!! He is a sweet cat- but Friday was not too impressed at all! She started hissing and growling.

Back to normal life now. Back to work tommorow.

2006-04-18T16:31:00.000-07:00

As we were planning to only spend one night in saint john we left most of our clothes in McAdam. I actually left all my warm clothes in Ottawa- I don't know what I was thinking. This is now our third night here in Saint John....

so today we went out shopping. I bought a warm wooly "ralph lauren" sweater from Value Village for $9.00. And I bought two rain coats (a green one to match my new green shoes and a light blue one!)-- they were only $10 each at Walmart. I need something here as its raining everyday... and also for home when I bike to work in the rain!!! They are like the old K-Way coats that fold into a pouch (except these ones zip all the way down, still fold into a pouch though). I sent my wish out to the universe (please let me find a cheap k-way type rain coat in green that is cheap!!!) Sending my wishes out almost always works! A neat trick my mother taught me.... I can't explain HOW it works, it just does! If I don't send the wish out I usually don't find what I am looking for. It has worked so many times... and you can wish for VERY specific things. It sounds crazy, I know. I got my almost new treadmill for $50 because I sent the wish out to the universe. Lots of other things too.... Its like if I concentrate on something I can will it to happen.. maybe its just a coincidence....

I fell madly in love with a purse at Old Navy!!! I left without it, however I may have to go back and *visit* it again :) I also bought a few craft supplies at Dollarama. And some beads at Walmart. And then tonight we bought Chinese Food. I told Tim's brother in law to order some fortune cookies and he ordered TWO- which I thought was kinda weird as there are six of us (if you include their two daughters)... I thought it was kinda sad that they weren't going to participate in the after dinner fortune cookie opening.... And then my fortune cookie didn't even have a fortune in it, even more sad!!!!

After dinner I read one of my new magazines. Since I have been away I have also started reading my new book.

I am feeling very relaxed. But I do miss all my pets SO MUCH! None of the houses we have visited have any pets, I am going through withdrawl :(

The weather is supposed to get abit sunnier and warmer for the next few days. Tommorow we go back to McAdam.

2006-04-17T20:28:00.000-07:00

We had two big easter dinners-

Yesterdays consisted of ham, turkey, potatoes, gravy, veggies (none of which I liked), real cranberry sauce (which I tried and liked), blueberry cheesecake, apple pie and minced meat pie (yeah, I wouldn't eat that last one!). We had a choice of water or milk (I opted for water). coffee with desert. I found the drink selection abit weird.... I guess I am used to having more drink options- but I find it interesting to see what other family choose to offer people at big family dinners (compared to what I am used to having when I visit my own family or what I would offer myself!)......

Today's dinner was brisket (done on the BBQ), mashed potatoes, veggies (again none that I liked!!), cheese sauce (which was delicious on the potatoes!!!), two types of bread, and freshly made, still warm cinnamon buns, store bought ice cream cake and chocolate cookies (I ate the first two desserts and they were SO incredibly good!!!!). We were offered diet coke, homemade white "mango" wine (delicious!!!) . coffee with dessert.

Both dinners were very tasty!!!

The weather is still blustery, cold, windy, rainy and gray (absolutely horrible actually!!!)- but I think I am getting used to it and having fun anyway. Today we went to the Saint John Market and bought salt water taffy, a neclace, a few other things.... As well there is a magazine store that sells NEW magazines (but about a month old-overstock) for $2.00..... so I bought 5 of them. I also bought some new beads at Michaels.... and a pair of lime green "Croc Type" clogs/slingbacks. We are staying here an extra night... Staying in Saint John (for me ) is way more fun than staying in McAdam.... It is easier to share a home (which is larger and laid out better) with his sister than his parents. I am still really looking forward to going to Grand Manan Island... probably Thursday. It was a nice feeling tonight to know that everyone is going back to school and work tommorow and we are still off for another week. It hasn't really felt like anything other than a holiday weekend yet really as everyone else was off too....

2006-04-16T18:24:00.000-07:00

It's Tim and I's two year anniverary today. TWO YEARS!!! Lucky us :)

We are in Saint John right now. We had a big Easter dinner in McAdam before driving here. The last couple of days have been rainy and gray! I find rainy and gray weather depressing. Blah! The next time I take holidays I want to go somewhere SUNNY and WARM.

2006-04-14T19:44:00.000-07:00

I am in NB. Yesterday we drove for 12 long hours. Today was relaxing. I walked around a small lake (took about 1.5 hours) and saw an Otter (or maybe it was a muscrat?) and read, and we had a BBQ. Hey Michelle, we stopped in Woodstock for a short break :) Tomorrow we are off to shop in Fredericton.

I was worried about my pets as I called Diana a few times and hadn't heard back... but I finally talked to her and everything is fine! Whew! I am happy now. I worry so much about my furry kids! I also worried that she might have mixed up the days... but all is good. I have an over active imagination at times!!!

Happy Easter Weekend everyone!

Will post again when I can.

2006-04-12T18:41:00.000-07:00

I got to the Herb and Spice store about 5 or 10 minutes before they closed. I got Benjamin (my rabbit) some organic dandelions, organic green pepper, fresh parsley, and baby carrots. I already had cucumber, lettuce, and apples for him at home. He eats better than I do! I bought myself a bar of emu oil soap and Jamaican sparkling lemonade. When I went up to the cash a woman walked in and the cashier said to her that they were closed and the woman said she only needed one thing and kept walking into the store. The cashier mumbled that she supposed that was fine then, as long as its only ONE thing. The girl behind me was looking at the take-out bar and the cashier told her that it was closed.... She may have just been looking at the individually packaged desserts on top. It took everything in me not to tell the cashier what a huge bitch I thought she was. Very poor customer service skills. But I like shopping there so I decided not to say anything.

I have managed to clean most of my apartment. The chinchillas are out for a lengthy run around and sandbath. Their cage is clean. My dishes are done. All I have left to do is mop the kitchen floor, take out the garbage and give my bathroom a quick once over.

10 days of nothing I have to do, no pets to care for, no job to go to. It's all about me (and Tim) for 10 whole days. It will just be wonderful.

2006-04-12T16:20:00.000-07:00

Another Map!

I am excited.... one more sleep. I went through all my CD's to find some travelling music and found a mixed CD I made when I lived in Toronto. It is so good that I forgot I was supposed to be cleaning and started dancing and singing around my apartment. It is a great CD to drive (and sing) to. I couldn't remember what was on it- so decided to play it :) I love to sing in the car. I used to be too shy to sing in front of people. I have gotten over that. I think in my next life I would like to be a singer.

I have managed to clean and pack. I have been doing that off and on since 9 am. I have to go out and buy Ben some more veggies.

I lost my keys today and had to go ask the landlord for a spare key. It was quite upsetting, but when Tim came over he found them- in the bathroom!

I don't have much left to do. The rest of my packing I will have to do in the morning, after my shower. I have packed alot of stuff. I hope I brought warm enough clothes... still deciding about that! I have no idea if I am forgetting things!

2006-04-12T12:27:00.000-07:00

Today is the first day of my holidays. So far I have done 4 loads of laundry (including ALL of my bedding). I did a little packing and cleaning. I have so much more to do....

Tim and I went to work to get my Vet Purchasing (and leave $ for it). Tim had a huge supply of chocolate shipped (from a client) to him from Europe :) He brought it so I could pick out whatI want and we dropped off a little at work and the rest he is giving to his coworkers. YUMMY. For me I picked out 3 giant Lindt bars (two of which I have never seen in Canada), and a box of After Eight's. We also kept a box of Fererro expresso filled chocolates for travelling! I also gave Sue a chocolate Lindt bunny, and left a couple of chocolates for coworkers that were off today. It is a giant chocolate windfall. It's nice to share. Tim doesn't eat chocolate, so more for me.... He may try the expresso chocolates as he loves coffee. We also went to DiRienzo's to get a sandwich.

What a beautiful day! I hope we get more weather like this in NB. Our vacation will probably go something like this: (Corina, are you laughing at me?...here's my judging preference coming out!!)

Thursday-travel ALL day to NB

Friday-relax in McAdam with Tim's parents

Saturday- Fredericton (farmer's market)

Sunday- drive to St.John to have Easter dinner at Tim's sister's

Monday- St. John

Tuesday- back to McAdam

Wednesday- Grand Manan Island (possibly either Tues, wed or Thurs depending on weather)

Thursday- relax in McAdam

Friday- relax

Saturday- drive back to Ottawa

Sunday- back home- last day of holiday

I am looking forward to being able to relax and hang out. Maybe make some jewellery, read... And as you all know I love to shop, so I am looking forward to visiting all the little shops. I never get tired of shopping. Usually I buy some birthday or xmas gifts when I travel. I usually buy one for me and a few for other people. If I love something I have a really hard time buying only one!

I think I can outshop pretty much anyone! (Beth and Corina would probably be my top competerors if they ever made shopping a sport!!!) I just never get tired of it... I could easily shop all day and still not want to go home! I don't even need to buy alot, I love to window shop and dream about maybe oneday buying things! Or just to get inspiration to decorate or make things... In highscool, my two best friends and I would go shopping every Saturday and shop ALL day. Poor LeeAnn hated shopping so she would just sit on the bench and Beth and I would go store to store to store, sometimes going back to the same stores over and over trying to make up our minds!!! LeeAnn had so much patience :) My mom ran out of patience shopping with me when I was young and said she would never shop with me again... luckily she has since changed her mind- but there must have been a good 10 year period where we did not shop together! Not having alot of money it does take me a long time to make decisions sometimes still.. I don't want to waste money or regret my purchases.... This drives Tim crazy at times! I am the same way at amusement park... I can't get enough of going on rides and going in shops. I only really want to go if I am with people who will enjoy being there from open until close!!

Ok back to my cleaning!!!!

2006-04-10T17:58:00.000-07:00

Dulce anyone? I think Dulce is so gross, but Tim loves it. But we always go hunting for fresh dulce when we are in NB. For Tim. Grand Manan Island is the plcae to go if you like to eat seaweed :) The Island is so beautiful. Stunning panormaic views of the ocean, cliffs, whales, dolphins, fishing villages, cute little shops. You have to show up really early if you want to get on the ferry. I want to go on a really nice day so we can have a picnic lunch on the cliffs overlooking the ocean. I will feel completely inner peace... I cannot wait. The ferry is only about an hour away from where we are staying.

2006-04-09T18:10:00.000-07:00

My massage was SOOooooo nice! Very relaxing. I don't know which I enjoy more, the massage or chit chatting with Allison as she does it. And she tells me which part of my body are "congested"....

Tim and I went to Chapters. I bought "Full Catastrophe Living"-- all about the mindfulness stress reduction program . My therapist recommended it. It's a merge of East and West. Buddhist philosophies/practices and modern medicine. I love buddhism. Talks all about mindfulness meditation and yoga, and the mind/body connection. I am going to try and read it cover to cover, instead just bits and pieces. I also bought a yoga DVD.... I thought it might be similar to the one I borrowed from Krishna, which I love... It has three yogas- AM, PM and a full hour long session... It is very different than the one I like... maybe I will like it after I do it a couple of times!! I also bought two bead magazines- which I am saving to read on my trip. Tim bought me a set of 4 journals that all fit into one little unit... and they are cute, retro looking, so now I can write everything down- but seperately... I love them! Shopping is fun :)

So as you may have noticed I like to share the boring details of my life. I never seem to run out of things to say, I only run out of time to write it all down. My mind swirls with thoughts, ideas, questions, and dreams.

2006-04-08T07:38:00.000-07:00

Last night I watched Dancer in the Dark. At some moments (especially through the first half)I thought the movie was a little weird , and the musical parts were unexpected (I somehow missed that when I read the back of the DVD) . I loved Bjork's voice though. The last part of the movie was fantastic- SO WELL DONE. One of the saddest, heart wrenching movies I have ever seen. The kind of movie you think about long after it ends. I also kept thinking "was this movie the movie that Bjork was at the Oscar's for when she was dressed up like a swan"?????

I also watched 13 Conversations About One Thing. I liked the line at the end that says "Life only makes sense when you look at it backwards". I think that is so true. I enjoyed this movie, even though its pace was kinda slow. It felt very true to life. Life isn't about what happens to you --but your perception of it and the choices you make. I like movies with interlapping story lines, so you can see how the actions of one person affect another.

Now back to my daily life:

I am leaving in 4 days, I have 2 days left of work :) I am having mild anxiety about leaving my pets in the care of someone else. I keep telling myself it will be fine..... I have a ton of cleaning to do... I am trying to write a list for Diana.... which I keep putting aside and going back to. For some reason I can't seem to write what I want to say in a way that makes any sense whatsoever. I am usually fine once I am on the road. but until then I find it stressful to get organized.

I finally got my haircut. I love it. Hopefully I will be able to style it without too much difficulty. Lately I have just been drying my hair and pulling it back, so this will be more work. But I still have the option of just pulling it back, which is nice!! I got abit of a scold about the condition my hair was in, as I hadn't cut it in 10 months... and I highlight it myself. And I cut my bangs myself! I felt abit like I had to justify my lifestyle. Maybe oneday I will be able to afford to go to a hairsalon every couple of months and maintain it- but not right now! So when I left I said I would try to get back sooner... I would definitely go back to Franco though. I gave him a $10 tip... so in the end it cost me just under $50. I would LOVE to get my color done professionally- which is what I kept thinking at the salon... but god could I really spend $100-$200 (I am guessing it would cost that, butI really don't know!!) just to color my hair. I think NOT. It's just not that important....

I am getting a massage in 2 hours!!!

2006-04-06T21:32:00.000-07:00

I had a meeting first thing this morning so I decided to force myself to do yoga- in case the meeting was stressful, which it wasn't. That was good. However for some reason I hardly slept last night, so this morning I made and drank an entire 6 cups (coffee maker sixed cups) of coffee. What a BAD idea. I am still jittery from all the caffeine. It made me feel sick, not awake. I spent my entire 10 hour shift feeling horrible from lack of sleep and too much caffeine... On top of that I decided to quit smoking last night, which I sincerely regret. Biking to work and home seemed to help make me feel better, but only for as long as I was on my bike. The faster I bike the worse my bike sounds, and I cannot figure out where the sound is coming from.....

I must get some sleep tonight as I work another 10 hours tommorow. As a reward for getting through tommorow's shift I am going to veg out tommorow night and watch movies lent to my by Krishna! They all look so good I have no idea which one to watch first!!!

Work was good. I felt really focused on helping people. Educating people. I love that. It is like a mental puzzle. How can I get them to leave better equipped so that in the future they can make better decisions than the ones they made in the past? Today it seemed to work. I really felt like everyone left on a positive note, feeling like we are a place of good, not evil.

And speaking of good, Tim has had an abundance of good news at work. I am cautiously optimistic. I knew he was brilliant all along, but now others have figured it out. I have never met anyone who worked so hard only to face so many setbacks and disappointments. I think maybe our luck has changed and I will enjoy every minute of it. It is so nice to see him so postive and happy :) That fills me with joy!

On that happy note I am off to what I am hoping will be a very good night's sleep!

2006-04-05T20:06:00.000-07:00

My day off was productive. I did two loads of laundry, dishes, cleaning, groceries, pet related cleaning. Tim and I had an indoor picnic lunch. Diana came over so I could introduce her to all my pets and go through all the stuff she'll have to do while she is housesitting. All she kept saying to my old cat was "PLEASE don't die while she is away"...

I finally made a hair appointment- Saturday at 11:30 with Franko :) I decided to try someone different.

For my anniversary present Tim has gotten me another one hour Shiatsu massage-- this Sunday at 2pm. I CAN'T wait.... thank you, thank you, thank you....

I have been getting headaches lately... I figure it is either from my eyes (needing new contacts/glasses) or from Nyquil withdrawl. Or it could be exhaustion. The last three nights I have not taken any nyquil- last night I did not even take Valerian. Tonight I am not sure what I will do.

Today I also bought a magazine... Martha Stewart Weddings! Because this week I watched an episode that showed how to make wedding bouquets out of tissue paper... It also shows you how to make hanging ornaments and paper lanterns.... It is the first wedding magaine I have bought in many years. I think I may be hooked on this particular magazine because there are so many crafty- do-it-yourself things in it. Tim and I had the most wonderful hypothetical conversation about our (oneday) honeymoon... possibly a week in Scotland and a week in Spain. All of a sudden I am very inspired to learn spanish. In between making paper flowers.... Where will I find the time?? It is nice to dream about the future and all the exciting things it may hold.

2006-04-04T20:34:00.000-07:00

Dreaming about my holidays! One week to go!!

2006-04-02T18:50:00.000-07:00

50 questions....(sent to me by Les)

1. Your name? Angela
2. Were you named after anyone? No 3. Do you wish on stars? only falling stars, are there any other kind of wishing stars?
4. When did you last cry? ~ a week ago (although I have had a couple of sad moments at work this past week that almost made me cry...)
5. Do you like your handwriting? not enough. I have been obsessed with my handwriting since public school
6. What is your favorite lunch meat? ham
7. What is your birth date? Oct 23, 1971
8. What is your most embarrassing CD? no idea... alot of my CD's were stolen during a B&E- I don't think any are embarassing..
9. If you were someone else, would you be friends withyou? I hope so
10. Do you have a journal? yes (I want to get a multi funtional journal to record different parts of my life, ie: health, sleep, money...etc)
11. Do you use sarcasm a lot? yes. my mother alway said that "sarcasm is not a form of humour, It's the idiotic babbling of a diseased mind"
12. What are your nicknames? Annie-O, Critter, Peep____ (y, ster, sterella, meister)
13. Would you bungee jump? maybe (I did the extreme skyflyer at Wonderland... 152ft drop at 100km hour,50FT freefall- GOD that was scary! more like skydiving/handgliding, but I imagine similar)
14. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? No 15 Do you think you are strong? mentally yes, physically not so much
16. What is your favorite ice cream flavor? chocolate.
17. Shoe size? 8.5 or 9
18. Red or pink? I love them both :)
19. What is your least favorite physical thing about yourself? my hair
20. Who do you miss most who died a few years ago? my cat, Ash
21. Do you want everyone you sent this to, to send it back? I am posting it on my blog, so its there for all the world to see....
22. What color pants, shirt, and shoes are you wearingright now? blue satin pj's (thanks Freene!) and a chocolate brown sweater (I know that doesn't really match...but its comfy)
23. What are you listening to right now? computer humming
24. Last thing you ate?homemade chimichanga and cajun roasted potatoes
25. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? not sure, maybe cranberry, or burnt orange
26. What is the weather like right now? cool
27. Last person you talked to on the phone? Tim
28. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex? mouth/face 29. Do you like the person who sent this to you? yes
30. Favorite drink? vitamin water 31. Favorite sport to watch? figure skating 32. What is your hair color? blonde
33. What is your eye color? Blue
34. Do you wear contacts? yes 35. What is your favorite food? cheese
36. Last movie you watched? Closer
37. Favorite day of the year? St. Patrick's Day and Canada Day 38. Scary movie or happy endings? both!!! lately I try to avoid scary movies as I have alot of nightmares
39. Hugs or kisses? both
40. Favorite dessert? homemade shortbread
41. Who is most likely to respond? nobody (as I am posting it on my blog)
42. Least likely?
43. What are your living arrangements? me, 2 cats, 2 chinchillas and a rabbit in my cosy apartment
44. Up early or late? preferably at least 9 am- but usually 6 or 7 45. Digital or 35mm camera? I only own a 35mm, but want a digital 46. What kind of car do you drive? bicycle
47. Go out to the movies or stay home and rent? both, rent more though 48. Pool or beach? ocean beach
49. Who is your best friend? Julie and Nat
50. Muscle car or sports car? neither

2006-04-02T13:42:00.000-07:00

I have decided that while it is great to have a collection of things, its not so great to just see them sitting on a shelf collecting dust, not getting any enjoyment. So here is a list of all the DVD's I own. If you would like to borrow one, just let me know! I also have a ton of VHS movies! I once lent a movie to a friend (she still has it) and almost three years later she hasn't gotten around to watching it..... that being said, if I lend you a movie I will expect it back within a reasonable amount of time!!!! (a week or two)

I like the idea of sharing. I hate the idea of being TOO attached to my possessions.

Here is a list of all my DVD's:

Notting Hill
Mona Lisa Smile
Nine Months
Thirteen
Hotel Rwanda
Grownups
Million Dollar Baby
Circle of Friends
Chocolat
Brokedown Palace
In America
City of Angels
The Notebook
The Butterfly Effect
About a Boy
Chasing Amy
50 First Dates
Love Actually
Bridget Jones Diary
Bridget Jones Diary: The Edge of Reason
Open Water
Sweet November
High Tension
Garden State
Closer

This is not the list, by any means, of all the movies that I love, want to own, or even think are fantastic. Some movies I buy without having seen them before. Some of my favorite movies I still don't own- but plan to buy at some point. I LOVE to watch movies.... I started buying movies when I didn't have cable (because I was too poor!!!!) , only had a second hand VCR.... I have gone a total of about 3 years of my life without cable TV. I love having it, but I could definitely live without it.

When I moved back to Ottawa 4 years ago I didn't have a bed (I actually did have a bed, but it was too big to fit into my tiny apt so I left it in storage), cable, computer or DVD player... I feel RICH in comparison to what my life was like then!

2006-03-31T15:41:00.000-08:00

My TO-DO list:

buy new contact lenses and eyeglasses (somewhat urgent)
buy a bicycle basket
do my taxes
make more jewellery (today I made something! It turned out great)
paint more
get my bicycle a tune up
open a joint bank account with Tim
save money
find out my credit rating
buy two books: If Budda Dated, and Full Catastrophe Living
hem my pants (too long to wear unless I wear my 3 inch heeled boots)
submit my rabies titre form at work(2.4 is what I am now at...Its been 5 years since my initial rabies vaccines)
buy bottle green water (ginger and lemongrass- YUM!)
keep up with my yoga (at least 3 times a week would make me happy! everyday may have been too ambitous! This week I did yoga 3 times)
clean my apartment before I go away
lose 10 lbs
get a haircut (my last one was June!!!)
cash in my airmiles for a magazine subscription
borrow binoculars (for the trip)
buy DVD's: walk the line and Brokeback Mountain
find my sunglasses- I had them a week ago and can't find them anywhere!

2006-03-30T18:30:00.000-08:00

In 2 weeks I will be on holidays. We are going to New Brunswick. I can't wait. This will be Tim and I's third trip to NB. We will stay in McAdam (and possibly St.John). The fun part is our day trips. We will go to Fredericton (Saturday morning farmer's market!!) and take the ferry to Grand Manan Island (my personal favorite), and maybe St.Andrew's by the Sea. Last summer we drove all the way to the Hopewell Rocks, and stopped in little towns along the way. I love the scenic drive along the Bay of Fundy. Everytime we go we find somewhere new to explore and visit. It's wonderful to spend 13 hours in a car from Ottawa to McAdam. We nap, eat, talk, sing and generally have a good time. I love getting to be with him day and night for 10 days. Getting to sleep next to the man I love is also a luxury I don't get very often. Not often enough anyway. I always go through withdrawl when we get home...

Often people ask me if I mind that my boyfriend works so much and that I don't get to see him very often. I don't mind. I feel lucky he is a part of my life and enjoy every minute we share together. After two years (this April 16th) I have gotten quite used to it. I admire that he works so hard to make his business a success and support him 100%. I only worry about how the long hours affect his health. I am a very independent person who cherishes my free time and space. I feel grateful to have him in my life and try to count our blessings. Life can change in an instant, one of us could get very sick or even die... so I try to appreciate what we have right now without wishing it could be something else. There are fleeting moments where I wish I could speed things up... but then I realize how lucky we are.

Soon enough we will live together and start the next phase of our life. I will appreciate having more time with him when it happens. For now I am content. I look forward to saving money and planning our wedding. Marrying the love of my life will be the happiest day of my life. It took me a long time to find him and I hope we have at least another 50 years together... We both know that what we have is truly special and rare. We have worked really hard the past two years to make it so. I have never felt so loved. It is a wonderful feeling to love so much.

2006-03-26T18:52:00.000-08:00

New things I like:

I bought Green Tea gum yesterday. It tastes just like regular sugar free spearmint gum. Each piece is like drinking two cups of green tea. I don't have alot of motivation to actually make a cup of tea, so this is perfect for me. All the health benefits of green tea in a gum.

I also bought Bottle Green Ginger & Lemongrass spring water drink, which I love. It is delicious.

2006-03-25T19:55:00.000-08:00

Natasha was adopted today!!! Thank you so much Krishna for calling to let me know! I was so happy to get your message! I can't believe it only took two days to find her a home I hope she does really well in her new home!!! Happy, happy news!

2006-03-25T13:23:00.000-08:00

I took Tabitha to the VET today. He said she has a very big, loud heart murmur :( and said said it is affecting her breathing (just a little). Her blood tests showed she is not diabetic, but her kidney values were UP. She doesn't have a Thyroid problem. She has catacts in both eyes. All in all he said "she's old" and to feed her whatever she likes!! I just have to watch her quality of life- which is good for now. She weighed 7.8lbs at the Vet- she only weighs 7lbs on my scale at home. One of them is wrong. She ws not a happy camper going to the vet- but Igave her some rescue remedy and sprayed some Feliway spray in the carrier- that seemed to help a bit- when I got her home she didn't hide like she normally does.

I bought more Method cleaning supplies- I bought the Method Eucaluptus Mint Tub & Tile cleaner. So now I have three of their products. The last one was Ylang Ylang Shower Cleaner.

Tonight I am going out for my friend's birthday dinner- at Mexi's at Dow's Lake. Tommorow I will lube my bike and clean my tub (fun fun fun).

2006-03-25T13:05:00.000-08:00

The face of a hard life.

2006-03-23T17:49:00.000-08:00

Natasha went up for adoptions today.... She passed! I am beyond happy.... I never thought she was going to pass. I went to visit her 4 times today! I hope it doesn't take too long to find her a good home!!! I fought really hard for her... It feels really good to fight to save a life, and win!

This Saturday I am taking Tabitha, my 15+year old cat to the Vet for bloodtests to hopefully find out why she is losing weight.... I figure it might be either kidneys or thryoid... I am anxious to see what we find... She is now 7 pounds, she used to be 13. I did a full geriatric screen bloodtest 7 months ago and everything was pretty normal. She is such a great cat- doesn't complain, quiet, loves attention, gentle, tolerant of me bringing home lots of foster kittens (and keeping one!)... She only ever asks for one thing- for me to open the door to the basement- she loves to go downstairs and hang out in the laundry room. I am not sure why she loves it so much, but she does. But now at least she comes when she is called...

My poor bike sounds like it is dying. It is so rusted and creaky and SLOW.... This weekend I am going to clean off some rust and get some bike oil!! Riding it all winter, without oiling it was probably a bad idea.

This Saturday is 20 times the Shopper's Points again!!!

2006-03-22T13:03:00.000-08:00

I bought this (pictured above) for my friend for her birthday on the weekend... I absolutely love it and really want to own one. It is to hang on the wall and put pictures or cards in... I figure if I had it I would switch it up seasonally- putting birthday cards in it, christmas cards, photos, post cards.... check it out at www.pier1.com (just as I typed that a Pier 1 commercial aired on TV- weird!!)

Today is my day off. Tim and I went to the Village Cafe in Westboro for lunch... Was very nice to just hang out and chat with him for an hour... They have great sandwiches on their lunch menu. I have only been once before for dinner (and had wished it was lunch cause that menu looked so much better).... It was a really tasty lunch!!!

Afterwards I went to the Superstore on Richmond and did some groceries. I bought a funky new shower curtain and some fantastic candles (PC Mandarin tealights), as well as food! I got my new (free) Kraft "What's Cooking" magazine in the mail today. I have also done two loads of laundry and abit of cleaning.... more cleaning later. A very good day off!

In three weeks I will be on holdiays!!! Can't wait :)

2006-03-22T08:03:00.000-08:00

I love this stuff.... I almost never leave home without this tiny little yellow bottle....

Rescue Remedy has been used successfully on stressful days where we suffer from impatience, tension and pressure. It has also been used successfully before a speech or job interview. Rescue Remedy helps us relax, get focused and get the needed calmness.
Rescue Remedy can also be taken just before going to bed to calm a troubled mind.

Flower essence therapy works on a similar mechanism as homeopathy. Parts of the flower are diluted and then potentised to become effective. Thus, the remedies work on an energetic level, similar to homeopathy, acupuncture and Reiki. They affect the mental and emotional parts of our being. Dr. Bach felt that physical illness can be caused by emotional upset and by fixing the emotional balance the physical illness disappeared.

Flower essences work to heal both physical, mental and emotional illness. All of the aforementioned illnesses affect each other in one way or another. Therefore, flower essences restore the inner balance by working on the vital force. The vital force is an inner force within the body that governs our strength and well-being. As we get sick our vital force weakens and therefore, the flower essences work on our vital force to strengthen it. The particles of the essences work in specific patterns. This means that certain essences cure certain illnesses. It is the practitioner's knowledge that is needed to pick out the correct remedy for the appropriate ailment. Overall, flower essence are to said to release negative emotions and help heal and calm, using either internally or externally non toxic and have no side effects and are safe for pets, people, children and animals of all sizes.

You can check out more on flower essences and their use on people and pets here and here.

2006-03-21T15:40:00.000-08:00

This is Natasha. She is 8 years old. I have fallen in love with her. Unfortunately. She is such a lovely cat. I wish I had a big enough home that I could adopt her. She reminds me so much of my cat Tabitha. I always seem to fall in love with cats that don't get put up for adoption. It broke my heart to leave work today, knowing that I have tommorow off, and that when I go back to work she probably won't be there....